Hate it!!!!

I hate that I can't lose anything or keep it off! I hate that no matter how hard I try I'm not getting anywhere. I've been exercising 30-60 min a day. I've cut back on my sweets and snacking. I'm watching my portions and STILL no success. I lost a few lbs only to have them come back on. I hate it! I hate the way I look! I hate it all. But I have 5 more weeks on this competition so I'll keep trying and keep hating how I can't be successful. Is it my age? My metabolism? The fact I only get 3-4 hrs of sleep a day? Is it because I work nights? I don't know and I'm too mad to care.

Week 1 of Biggest Loser

This week has been Week 1 of my Biggest Loser Challenge with work. I have tried really hard to cut back on my soda and sweets. I think I've done pretty good too. I didn't deprive myself of everything I just cut back. Baby steps right? I haven't had any soda except for 1 while I'm working to keep me up at night. Even that I'm trying to get away from by buying those 5 hr energy drinks. I haven't had as many desserts but I do have a small treat at times to satisfy my sweet tooth. It's all about portion control for me. I've tried eating healthier and smaller portions for my meals as well. Cutting back on potato chips at lunch time and drinking a lot more water. So after my initial weigh in of 189 my weigh in today was 185.6! Jen and I have been exercising to some DVD's that we have that also incorporate weights in them. I've moved up from 5 lbs weights to 10 lbs weights. I have Bob and Jillian from the t.v. show The Biggest Loser coming into my home to make me work out. I'm loving it and hating it. They are tough videos and make me sweat but I love it. I love feeling like my workouts are doing something for me. We also do Zumba for a day of cardio in between those with weights. I'm excited to see some good results and hope that I can continue to lose weight. I really want to make this work so I'll keep exercising and possibly increase my time doing so from 25-30 min to closer to 45 min this week. I just need to remember that slow and steady sometimes really does win the race. Also to keep cutting back on the portions and sweets. Maybe if I do it little by little I can make and keep the changes instead of feeling hungry and deprived where I'll crave and binge. So here's to another week ahead of making little changes that are good for me and to becoming a healthier person! Way to go Me on the weight loss!

The Biggest Loser!

I don't want to take a picture of just me and I don't have one of just me so I'm going to use this picture as my before picture. This week started my Biggest Loser Challenge. My company every year has a Biggest Loser Competition. We put together a team or get put on a team and then do our best to lose weight. There are weigh ins and prizes so we are accountable. Since I didn't have to pay to participate I thought why not? I have a bunch of weight to lose and so here I go! We go from July 11th - Aug 19th. So far I'm motivated, of course it just started, but I really do want to lose weight. I want to be healthy. I know it will take a while to get to my goal but I believe I can do it. So as of yesterday my starting weight was 189.0, although I fluctuate between 188-191. I want to be around 115 since that is in the middle to upper middle weight in my healthy range. I really just want to be able to fit into some of my clothes again and then eventually get down to the size where there are cute clothes. So wish me luck! I have some DVD's to do, I will exercise some outside when it's not too hot, and the hardest will be to watch what I eat. I don't eat a lot but I don't think I eat the right things. I really want to win and be The Biggest Loser!